Monday, April 26, 2010

Self Analysis

I recently went to see The Lion King. It was my second time to see it--the first time probably being about 7 or so years ago.

I still would very much recommend it to anyone. It's an extremely creative production. The costumes and methods they use are nothing short of spectacular.

That said, I also found that I enjoyed it less the second time. While most things must bear the law of diminishing returns, I'm not sure that fully explains the reason. My initial reaction was that I didn't remember how kid-oriented the show is--but upon further reflection of my past, that formerly would have been one of the reasons I loved it so much...

People always comment upon what a happy person I am...always smiling, always pleasant, never gets angry. To me this actually might be more along the lines of how happy I appear to be...

Nonetheless, over the past couple of years I am starting to notice what I would term as a slight loss with my 'inner child'...which in some respects saddens me.

Certainly, growing up gay and in the closet, living a sheltered and religious-oriented life in the south, and then moving to the northeast (which has some considerable differences in how people behave), would definitely be expected to cause some growth.

...and growth of course is a good thing; but if my ability (or nature) to tap into a child-like wonder gets diminished in the process, I'm not so sure it's advancement.

I want to be wise and learn from my experiences...not become bitter and resentful from them.

This is not to say that I'm bitter and resentful, but I want to stay mindful of acheiving the balance that can potentially bring me more complete happiness...

There's also some consideration of where we gays fit into the whole "circle of life" concept, but I'll save that for another post.

All that said...anyone wanting to get in touch with their inner child, should go see The Lion King.

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